I’ve decided that this year I’m going to have the most awesome locker in the entire school!
I may be a total dork, but my locker is going to be WAY cooler than any other locker that ever existed in the history of lockers.
HOW am I going to accomplish this impressive fete, you ask?
Simple! I’m going to make a list of all the awesome things I need to create this locker-extraordinaire with convincing explanations for why all of these things are absolute necessities.
These items (and my super convincing explanations) include:
1. Musical note magnets
Since I’m clearly a future pop star, I’m planning to have a Glee themed locker, which means musical everything!
My explanation for my mom:
I absolutely NEED a vast selection of high-quality magnets so I can hang notes for quizzes. This way, I can study just a little every time I open my locker in between classes. (And magnets are far more responsible than tape, since they don’t leave any sticky residue. You want me to be responsible, DON’T YOU MOM!?)
2. Musical note shelf paper
What better way to extend the theme AND cover up that drab-colored locker shelf?
My explanation for my mom:
Research shows that 87.9% of students spill stainable liquids inside their locker at some point during the school year. I take locker cleanliness seriously! (Yes, friends, I absolutely made that number up, but “research shows” sounds pretty convincing!)
3. A sparkly sticky mirror
OK, so I don’t plan to stand in front of my locker applying cherry lip gloss 24-7, like some SUPER conceited CCPs I know. But a locker mirror isn’t just about vanity. It says, “I care enough about my not-so-secret crush to NOT walk around with a massive piece of ham wedged between my front teeth.”
My explanation for my mom:
A prepared student always maintains a put-together appearance. You never know when the principle might call you into the office for some super important responsibility, like running an athletic club.
4. A mini dry erase board
This is absolutely crucial! It’s like an answering machine for your locker that only super close friends who know your combination can use. Just picture all the exciting messages Zoey and Chloe could leave. Like: “Hey Girl! Meet us in the janitor’s closet before lunch!” Or: “OMG Brandon is totally looking for you, carrying a dozen roses and a teddy bear!!”
My explanation for my mom:
It’s essential that I have the means to jot down thoughts quickly and efficiently between classes. This way, if I think of something that might look good on my college application someday, I won’t forget it while I’m fumbling around for notebooks in my locker! (Note the use of “college application.” Huge brownie points with mom!)
5. An assortment of magazines
This way, I can cut out a number of Justin Bieber and Jonas Brothers photos to create a cute celeb collage. Every cool locker needs a cute celeb collage!
My explanation for my mom:
Studies show that kids who socialize with a wide range of other students perform better on standardized tests (another boldfaced lie). An interesting locker focal point, such as a collage featuring pop singers, could help me create new friendships AND excel in my studies!
So that’s the list for my super cool locker! I’m thinking I might also hang an air freshener, a mini calendar, and of course, like a BAZILLION photos of me, Chloe, and Zoey. What else should I get?
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